Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
