she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
