im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
