Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
