is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
