you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
