that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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