I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
