5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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