put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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