someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
