he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize