Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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