Where is the hickey?
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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