I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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