i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
He told me they were just razor bumps!
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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