So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
