Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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