Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
