i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I think I just sharted jello shots
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize