If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
