question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
