I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
no. you can't hotbox the world.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
