i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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