you would pick up someone in the library
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
this will be a night to untag.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
