So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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