shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
