so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
