hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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