Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize