we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
