we have officially lost it.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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