Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.

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(712): View more from Iowa

The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.

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(646): View more from New York

You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home

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(228): View more from Mississippi

Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.

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(620): View more from Kansas

just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.

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(904): View more from Florida

That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.

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