whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
