Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
even my farts smell like vagina
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
