The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize