I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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