party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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