i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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