the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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