We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
