Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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