haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
