It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I have aggressive nipples.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
