perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
