i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
