Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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