We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
