I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
