all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
